Sister-In-Law Update

I scanned my blog to see what I have written about in the past and I noticed a definite trend - my sister-in-law provides quite a bit of fodder. So, I thought it would be high time to offer an update on how the little tramp dear is impacting the family dynamics.

She's still nuts.

That about sums things up... I mean, I haven't talked to her in nearly a year. In January she blocked my phone, Facebook and anything else she could think of. I sent around a family newsletter and had no way of contacting her, so their family didn't get it. Her husband was ticked and I explained that I couldn't contact his wife and that I was sending it to the women.

Radio silence.

My mother-in-law jumped in at that point - baby boy can't get his feelings hurt after all. Bow down to his wife and kiss her ass like everyone else has for the past 7 years she said. No... no, that doesn't seem like fun at all. I've done that and it doesn't really help - it takes effort and quite frankly, she's not worth it. She has treated the whole family like shit (or at least those of us that don't have anything to give her, like land or money or whatever) and I've had enough of it.

So my husband and I finally decided we were done dealing with her. Done dealing with everyone that's enabling her. Just done in general. We opted out of birthdays, graduation parties and anything else she would be at. There's no point in going since we didn't want to watch the sickening display of everyone acting like she's a fucking saint while she's ignoring us for absolutely no reason.

I literally mean that. You can speak to this woman and she will turn her head the other way as if you simply aren't there. People witness this and continue to talk to her like she has done absolutely nothing out of the ordinary, because for her, that's not unordinary. If they address her behavior, she turns the crazy on them. Her degree of crazy can vary... she once slashed my mother-in-law's tires, but we're supposed to act like that never happened because she gave birth to someone's children and said they were my brother-in-law's.

Now, nobody gave a rats ass that this was going on until recently. My mother-in-law said it was between them and us and she was staying out of it. She had 900 reasons why she couldn't ask what their problem was. My husband tried reaching out to his brother early on and got nothing but silence. It was not in her best interest to ask, so she didn't.

Now it's the holidays and my mother-in-law wants to have a big happy family around her dining room table (which is like a 4-person table, but I digress) and she is suddenly upset that we aren't going to her events. She knew this is what was going to happen. She knew we couldn't get in touch with them and she refused to say anything to them. Like always, she refuses to address the behavior if it's them because (and this was her reasoning, not mine) if she says anything to them about the way they act, they keep her from seeing the grandkids.

It's disgusting. The way they act and the way she enables them. I am ashamed to be related to these people through marriage. It's really pushing me to find a way to move my family away from this jolly band of assholes. We don't go to events now and I figure 1,000 miles between us will at least keep the invitations from being issued so I don't have to decline and then listen to my mother-in-law rant and rave.

Family Dispute

So the fighting between my youngest brother-in-law, his family and my father-in-law continues. This weekend we're heading down to my father-in-law's house to celebrate Thanksgiving with his girlfriend, her kids, his sister (my husband's aunt) and her family. I think my middle brother-in-law is also supposed to be there with his boyfriend.

So basically 2 of my father-in-law's 3 kids will be there and we're supposed to just pretend like the 3rd son doesn't exist. I'm sure my FIL will make at least a couple comments about him, which is going to be super awkward since the middle brother-in-law's boyfriend is bosom buddies with the youngest brother-in-law's wife.

Confused yet?

Oh and then to top things off, my FIL's girlfriend casually asked on Wednesday if we wanted to do our Christmas exchange on Sunday. We weren't even aware of who would be participating in such an exchange.

Not to sound like the Grinch or anything, but I'm a little (ok, a lot) not thrilled about buying extra gifts for children I don't know and probably won't see ever again. My father-in-law's girlfriend has a 14 year old and a 9 year old that will be there as well as her 11 year old granddaughter who now lives with them. The girlfriend has custody of the 14 year old son, but the 9 year old daughter lives with her father and sees her mother on the weekends (they have different fathers). The 11 year old granddaughter is living there because her mother was homeless and living in a car - I'm not sure if said homeless mother will be at Thanksgivmas or not. My husband's aunt will also be at the Thanksgivmas celebration, meaning we'll also need to get something for his aunt, her husband and their 2 kids. We actually know them though, so that's slightly better than the 11 year old grandaughter of the 40-something year old girlfriend.

I really really really wish that my father-in-law had held off playing house until we knew whether or not the girlfriend was going to be a permanent fixture in our lives. He always berated my middle brother-in-law (the gay one) about moving guys in so quickly and then the moment he became single he did the exact same thing. I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Anyway, that's my rant - I guess I'll just have to see how the drama plays out between everyone while doing my best to keep my opinions to myself. I hope my father-in-law doesn't bring up the whole apartment thing or the whole missing brother-in-law thing because I really don't know how civil I can keep the discussion if he does. Well, wish me luck!

Oh, and also, fingers crossed that my father-in-laws girlfriend knows how to make a good Thanksgiving meal. LOL - I've never had anything that she's cooked, so I don't know what to expect.